Encouragement

It's such an incredible thing to find myself now doing what little I can to help others through the inevitable should-I-really-be-studying-this crisis that I so recently journeyed through (with the help of others too). I really am so glad that I struggled (and still continue to struggle sometimes) with my decision to immerse myself in the study of music for my baccalaureate degree. I have been forced to really understand myself and my volition, for living an apathetic lie is waste of time.

And so I encourage you, too, to wrestle. Wrestle with your mind. Wrestle with your soul. Wrestle with God. Through the strife and strain you will come to understand yourself as a human, and you will find yourself humbled, which is the only thing humans should be. You will be forced to defend yourself, you will be forced to know your weakness (and you will be forced to come to the disheartening conclusion that we often waste precious energy defending parts of ourselves that really should be done away with), and you will be forced to feel your opponent, knowing your opponent as well as yourself (for often your opponent is yourself). You will understand what is truly important, and the things which are stronger will dominate the things that are weaker. You will find yourself pruned. And like a vine after winter, you will bloom stronger and sturdier than before come summer.

Take heart, for it is in the crucible that the measurements are drawn, and the contents are purified. And do not avoid the crucible for the sake of ease and comfort. For living an apathetic lie is a waste of time. Once you understand yourself, you will finally be able to release yourself for the sake of others, and that's where the real work begins.